Friday, June 14, 2013

Age & the witch

I recently came across this piece written by Jonathan Swift, which he wrote at the age of 32:
When I come to be old. 1699.
Not to marry a young Woman.
Not to keep young Company unless they reely desire it.
Not to be peevish or morose, or suspicious.
Not to scorn present Ways, or Wits, or Fashions, or Men, or War, &c.
Not to be fond of Children, or let them come near me hardly.
Not to tell the same story over and over to the same People.
Not to be covetous.
Not to neglect decency, or cleenlyness, for fear of falling into Nastyness.
Not to be over severe with young People, but give Allowances for their youthfull follyes and weaknesses.
Not to be influenced by, or give ear to knavish tatling servants, or others.
Not to be too free of advise, nor trouble any but those that desire it.
To desire some good Friends to inform me wch of these Resolutions I break, or neglect, and wherein; and reform accordingly.
Not to talk much, nor of my self.
Not to boast of my former beauty, or strength, or favor with Ladyes, &c.
Not to hearken to Flatteryes, nor conceive I can be beloved by a young woman, et eos qui hereditatem captant, odisse ac vitare.
Not to be positive or opiniative.
Not to sett up for observing all these Rules; for fear I should observe none.
One thing is clear: the more maladaptive ways of ageing have not changed in the past 300 years. These things aren't limited to those of great age, of course, but younger people are frequently annoyed by those of great age on the basis that they're miserable, stubborn, bigoted, etc, & attribute this to the fact that they're old. Yes, old people are annoying when they are these things, but young people are annoying when they are shallow, impatient, impulsive & reckless.
Perhaps it is for both extremes of age not to fall into the 'vices' proper to those ages. Nor is it cool (I've checked that word out, & have discovered that it is a 1950s beatnik word & I am therefore safe in using it without dating myself to the slang of my youth) at either extreme of age to attempt to be the other extreme. It is to be expected as a young person to think you have the answers to all life's questions; but young people who aspire to be very mature before they have it in them make a fool of themselves as do the old people who (usually try to) dress & act in the latest fashions of youth.
My personal example of gracious ageing is the lovely Honor Blackman, whom my mother always used to call 'mutton dressed as lamb,' which I don't think a fair description. I feel that her book with a title along the lines of 'How to Look & Feel Half Your Age For the Rest of your Life,' is mistitled, since what she does do very well is to play to her strengths. She has very good teeth, which she shows much more than she did in older photos, dresses well for her own body shape, & keeps fit (I would advise most people to steer clear of the diet she advocates in the book, to me it is clearly a slimming diet & doesn't include nearly enough protein & calcium).
Anyone who does these things: play to your strengths, do something about your weaknesses, act your age & dress timelessly in a style which suits your self & your natural body shape, can't go far wrong at any age! I feel ageing is probably something of concern to witches: the practice of witchcraft conversely both keeps you young & ages you because of the exposure to so much of the world's debris. For witches who've aged well, Lois Bourne & Fred Lamond spring to mind. *Ahem* Janet Farrar & Laurie Cabot spring to mind as examples of not such good ageing - facial tattoos spell rebellion or prison in cultures where they're not routine.
For myself I'm older know than I've ever been in my life & after a few stressful periods life is better than it's ever been. The crucial question here, since witches are very keen on making things how we will them to be, is what I have done to end up where I am now. I think it is this: I am being me & not trying to be anyone or anything else. I know who I am & am unapologetic about it. I notice that Swift's list of resolutions is mainly things not to do, which is not really the witch's way. Knowing it, willing it, & doing it is our way so here is my list:
As I age:
I will act my age & not try to be any other.
I will be myself without accepting the perceived limitations of whatever age I am.
I will seek out whatever company I damn well please, if it's mutually enriching & pleasant.
I will maintain an interest in a sex life, since to lose interest in this is to cut yourself off from a major mystery of life, & source of life & pleasure.
I will seek out partners suitable to my stage of life - my 'type' seems to be getting older as I am, & young men are frankly never any good in bed.
I will not become embittered: it's too late for me to resist stubbornness but at least there's one I can do.
I will continue to do new things, acquire new interests to complement the old ones & actively avoid getting stuck in a rut.
I will not eat at 12 noon or 5pm unless it happens to suit me (weird, I know, but those are the only two times my mother will eat).
I will continue to develop my trust that the universe will forever look after me, give me pleasure & challenge me. This journey will not end until my life does.
I will attempt to maintain my health as best I can & will not accept diminishments of ability or potential without a fight.
I will start smoking again at the age of 80, or if I go blind or get a terminal illness. My addiction is alive & strong & I don't want to die without once more embracing Our Lady Nicotine. Starting again in old age would hopefully mean I cheat her of the long-term effects of smoking, if I don't start because of having a terminal disease.
I will continue to seek as my highest goal, going through life without fear, including the fear of death. I am a priest of a death Goddess & accept that she will take my life when it suits her. I may have warning or not. If my life becomes too much for me to bear, through pain or disease, I may renege of this though.
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